Is there really an easy way to ‘manage’ the vast network of interlinking images, memories and associated feelings sparking through my head all the time? Is it truly possible to keep focused on positive up-beat thoughts?

Bet the Dalai Lama has off-days.

One solution is an NLP exercise called ‘The Stalker’, described by Robert Dilts. It involves imagining that you’re observing yourself being yourself.

Imagine you are tracking yourself just as a stalker stalks his prey. Observe your thoughts, feelings, reactions and breathing rate….I’ve found it’s excellent device when I am in tricky meetings and want to keep a lid on wayward emotions. Takes concentration though – and, after a while, I just get bored of being vigilant about me.

So, my current strategy is to ‘enjoy the ride’.

When I come across a thought that’s fun, I ‘ride’ it for all it’s worth. Given that a thought is merely an electrochemical reaction my head, I let most move on through my mind, without spending time on them. In other words, I’m learning to choose what thoughts to focus on, just as I might pick the most enjoyable rides to go on at a funfair.

Let’s get over it, please! Trance is an efficient way to discover what’s going on inside your mind and changing it.  Lots of the NLP tools designed ‘to build resourceful states of excellence’ only work properly once we add hypnosis into the mix. Some of them even get you into a trance just by doing them.

The ‘visual squash’, the ‘swish’, the ‘fast phobia cure’ etc. etc. all demand that you make pictures in your mind’s eye. And that’s the first step to a hypnotic state, right there.

How do you do that?  Perhaps you could start by smiling broadly, or think fondly of some good times you’ve had. You could imagine some pleasurable event you already have planned. Once you are filled with a sense of well-being and happiness, do this experiment – think about a memory that isn’t so pleasant. Find a recent incident that irritated you, for example.

Could you find an irritating memory? If you did, notice what happened to your mood. Did it stay the same? If so, just how irritating was that memory?

It’s difficult to hold two opposing moods in your head at the same time. Something has to change – your mood or your memory. That’s how our brains store information.

A miserable mood will connect with your miserable memories; an energetic mood will connect with lots of energetic thoughts. So, if you feel lethargic but want to feel energetic, start remembering all those times when you felt full of beans. As you do, your spirit will lift, your mood will improve and you’ll be raring to go.

Check this out for yourself. It’s a top tip.

If you try to imagine this and draw a blank, then please think again. The more you imagine and flesh out the future you want, the more likely it is that you will draw that dream towards you.

If you are doubtful that this might be, in any way, useful advice, then change your mind, at least for the purposes of this exercise. Treat this as an experiment in actively creating your life.

Spend half-hour drawing or writing your imagined ideal future. Your unconscious mind works with moods and atmospheres, not concrete facts, so, as you do this, fill yourself with the feelings you want to be having at this time next year.

Once you are satisfied that you have captured your dream on paper, put it away and forget about it.

Your unconscious mind will do what it does all the time and does best – create for you the experiences that you expect. It does this because it treats imagination and reality very similarly.

Don’t believe me. Test this out for yourself

The workshop ‘My Future’ works with this principle and helps you develop a personal template for your unconscious mind to work upon. The next ‘My Future’ is on April 10th. See http://www.futureseeing.com/workshop-my-future.htm for details.

Wishing you a happy Easter – this year and, especially,  next.

Later, as the yachtsman sailed away, he heard a shout. Turning, he saw the old man coming towards the boat, walking on the water. ‘Wait’ shouted the old man. ‘What was that word again?’

(An oldie – but a goodie)

Consider the words you use when you talk about your situation. Your phrases hold clues to the direction you want to go. List them and see what point you’re making. Now talk about what you could be doing and what you’d like to do. Your language gives you clues for you to follow.

Use your words as pointers.  From them, build your internal compass and you can gain a confident sense of personal direction.

Having a miserable day? All right, you possibly are. But before you chuck the whole day into your wheelie bin of rotten memories, to fester with the rest, take a moment to check that it is all bad. I bet you’ll remember some things that have happened that were not awful. Were some even OK?

Add up as many moments that you can think of that weren’t miserable. There might even have been a few quite good bits if you look hard enough.

And now describe your day. It’s usually not so bad after all.

Work on your timing and delivery and those bad experiences might even make good stories to tell your mates.

We are all imagining things all the time, so don’t believe anyone who says they have no imagination. Tell them ‘You must have one to have imagined that!’  Our imagination shapes our reaction to everything around us and everything that happens to us. Most of the time we don’t notice it.

It’s like the muscles that beat our heart – working away automatically. But once you realise that your imagination is active whether you aware of it or not, your life starts to change. You can start to use your imagination to make life more fun.

Every morning, a small group of elderly Japanese ladies meet to cheer each other up. How they do it is so simple, it’s hard to believe. Together they say ‘I am happy, I am happy’ over and over. Then they say ‘ I am laughing, I am laughing, I am laughing’ till they start to laugh, often a bit forced at first.

And then the laughing starts to build and build, till their tummies start to wobble, their heads roll back and the tears drip down their happy cheeks. They say the good feelings last all day.

Criticism hurts, but that hurt doesn’t have to last for long. First step is to realise that everyone criticises from their own perspective. What people see in other people, they always have in themselves. If you don’t believe that, check it out. Next time someone tells you that you are thoughtless, lazy, unprepared, annoying etc. consider how thoughtless, lazy, unprepared, or annoying. the critic themselves might be. They may not have these traits in the same way you do, but there will be some aspect of their criticism of you that they will have in themselves.

Remember, it truly does ‘take one to know one’.